Neigh Way Mee Horse Dung That

I got thinking the other day as I passed a massive portion of horse manure on the footpath. How come horse riders get away with letting their animal plop onto the pavement yet a dog owner has to carry a pooper-scooper or Morrisons bag (or a Waitrose bag if you have a four-wheel drive and have special seats for your dogs) to avoid a fine? If dog owners were riding their dogs, would that let them off the hook? I imagine that because horse poop is good for the garden, it's not seen as a hazard but I wouldn't like to fall flat in my face into one to find out. Perhaps the horse rider should have a back-pack or bin liner to attend to their ploppers-plop. Pooper-scooper doesn't sound right for a horse, so maybe a new name like 'Dung-Digger' would do.

On that same day I found the horse present, I got stuck in a long traffic jam. I later learned that this was caused by a horse which had escaped onto the motorway. Imagine having a horse coming towards you on a fast road, no wonder they go round crapping themselves (the horse not the driver...although....mmm). But look at this unbelievable story, from around the same area that horse escaped; a horse went to the cinema - it's true, read it. Clearly, there's a horse around Boldon that is really frustrated with life, goes round plopping itself, running naked through fields and onto dual carriageways. And to top it all off, wants a piece of what humans get up to, so trots off to to see a movie. Black Beauty wasn't even playing.